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ORIGINAL AIR DATE ON USA
2007/07/06

Burn Notice
1x02 Identity

 

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My name is Michael Westen.

 

I used to be a spy until-

 

- [ Man ] We got a burn notice on you.
You're blacklisted.
- [ Whistles ]

 

[ Michael Narrating ]
When you're burned,you've got nothing-

 

no cash, no credit, no job history.

 

- You're stuck in whatever city
they decide to dump you in.
- Where am I?

 

Miami.

 

You do whatever work comes your way.

 

- You rely on anyone who's still talking to you-
- [ Laughs ]

 

- a trigger-happy ex-girlfriend-
- Should we shoot them?

 

a friend who's informing
on you to the feds-

 

You know spies.
Bunch of bitchy little girls.

 

- and family too-
- Hey, is that your mom again?

 

- if you're desperate.
- Someone needs your help, Michael.

 

Bottom line:
Until you figure out who burned you.. .

 

you're not going anywhere.

 

[ Michael Narrating ]
A surveillance photo can tell you.. .

 

- a lot about the photographer.
- [ Camera Shutter Clicks ]

 

[ Camera Shutter Clicks ]

 

- [ Camera Shutter Clicks ]
- Surveillance takes planning.

 

You have to scout the area.
You need a place to sit.. .

 

and wait for the target
for an hour-or 1 0.

 

You need to take a leak
now and then.

 

- Lots of chances to get seen.
- [ Camera Shutter Clicks ]

 

[ Camera Shutter Clicking ]

 

- Morning.
- [ Camera Shutter Clicks ]

 

Michael, good to see you.

 

[ Michael Narrating ]
You can't choose your intelligence sources.

 

Might be a heroin smuggler,
a dictator or your mom.

 

I was beginning to wonder if you were gonna
stand in the middle of the road all day...

 

- or come in for a visit.
- I need to ask you something.

 

Anyone unknown to you been around
the house the last few months?

 

Any unfamiliar faces on the street?

 

Maybe a, uh, repair truck that just
seems to sit there?

 

I don't know.

 

I really don't notice what my neighbors do.
I'm not interested in them.

 

You'd notice if the neighbor
hasn't vacuumed his car.

 

If the postman isn't wearing his wedding ring,
just tell me.

 

As a matter of fact, a few months ago
there were two men here taking pictures.

 

- They were very nice.
- You met them?

 

Mm-hmm.
They came in for coffee.

 

I made them deviled egg sandwiches.

 

They were in some sort of,
um-

 

I don't know.
Some government something.

 

- Wait, wait, wait. Government something?
- Mmm.

 

- Who exactly do they work for?
- How should I know?

 

All these years, I don't know
who in the hell you work for.

 

Travel all over the world saying,
"Oh, can't talk about it."

 

Well, I don't have a job anymore,
so there's nothing you have to worry about.

 

What did they talk to you about?
What did they ask?

 

I don't know. But I did show
one of them the garden.

 

Wait. You left one alone in here?
How long?

 

Hmm. I don't remember.

 

You know, the doctor says what's wrong
with me could be affecting my memory.

 

[ Chuckles ] Your memory's fine.
If there's anyone who could use
a little memory loss, it's you.

 

[ Michael Narrating ]
My mother's understanding of my career.. .

 

changes with what she wants from me.

 

One day she can name everyone
on the National Security Council.

 

The next day she thinks
I work for the post office.

 

My friend Dawn in my bridge group-
She's had memory problems.

 

Which reminds me- I want to talk to you
about a friend of mine.

 

In a sec.

 

- Michael, what are you doing?
- [ Michael Narrating ]
Not all bugs are the same.

 

If it's got a battery,
it's disposable, short-term.

 

If it's wired into the house power,
it's a longer-term thing.

 

If it has a transmitter,you can figure out
how close the listener is.

 

Mom, are there any empty houses
in the neighborhood...

 

within, say, mmm, 3 50 meters?

 

Across the street, two doors down.

 

[ Beeping ]

 

[ Michael Narrating ] Once your surveillance
knows you're onto them.. .

 

the clock starts ticking.

 

They know you're coming,
so the question for them.. .

 

is whether they can destroy their
equipment and get out of there in time.

 

No! No, no, no!

 

OhI

 

- [ Engine Starts ]
- [ Michael Narrating ] The question for you.. .

 

is whether you can find them
before every bit of useful information.. .

 

is turned into a pile
ofburning slag.

 

[ Coughing ]

 

What happened to you?
You smell like burnt plastic.

 

Yeah, uh, I think there's
a fire down the road.

 

Um-And the smoke, it drifted.

 

[ Coughing ]

 

[ Sirens Wailing ]

 

Mom, we need to talk about
the men who came to the house.

 

I need to know what they asked you,
what you told them.

 

- It's important for my job.
- I thought you didn't have a job.

 

Yeah. You know, it's-
it's hard to explain.

 

Yeah, well, I don't remember.

 

[ Sirens Continue Wailing ]

 

This thing about my friend
has me very upset.

 

It's hard to think about
anything else.

 

Fine, Mother. Let's talk
about your friend.

 

Well, it's my neighbor Laura.
All right?

 

These people came over
to her house with some kind of a scam.

 

They got all of her
bank account numbers.

 

They took everything that she has.

 

And they beat her up, Michael.
She's terrified.

 

Well, what am I supposed to do?

 

Well, you'll think of something.

 

She lives right across the street.
You could go there now.

 

I talk to your friend...

 

and then we talk about the men
who came to the house.

 

Thank you so much for coming.

 

When Madeline said you could
help me, I was so relieved.

 

Well, what happened exactly?

 

I got a letter...
about a month ago.

 

Uh, said I'd won a prize.

 

One of those magazine things.

 

I called, and they congratulated me.

 

Said they had to send
some people over...

 

to fill out some tax forms.

 

And they came over,
and-

 

There were two men and a woman.

 

They were in such a hurry
to get my information.

 

Credit cards, bank accounts.

 

I got nervous
and I asked them to leave.

 

I tried to call the police,
and they hit me.

 

Broke my arm.

 

I checked my bank account.
It's all gone.

 

It's all I had.

 

Uh, do you-
Do you have anything that, uh-

 

Do you have a description of them?

 

Oh, I'm not very good
at that sort of thing.

 

The main one- He was good-looking.
Blond.

 

The other two were...
just regular.

 

- With brown hair.
- Regular-looking with brown hair?

 

I have the prize letter.

 

My son wants to put me
in a home now.

 

Thinks I can't be trusted.

 

Uh, I'll see what I can do.
I'm gonna need to borrow this, okay?

 

[ Sobs ]

 

I should go.

 

I'm gonna go.

 

[ Laughing ]
So,you're helping old ladies now.

 

Good for you, Mike. Hey, I saw a kitten
up a tree on my way over here.

 

They beat her up. Took her life savings.
You in or not?

 

Well,you put it that way, what can I say?
What's the plan?

 

Well, the address and phone number are fake,
but the printing- the foil embossing-

 

There can't be more than one place in Miami
that does that kind of work.

 

- Sounds good.
- Uh- [ Clears Throat ]

 

Listen. The money on this one
will be a little thin.

 

Well, it's a public service.
Hey, how about a trade?

 

I, uh, had a little disagreement
with the lady friend I was staying with...

 

and, uh, I could
use a place to crash.

 

- Three days.
- I was thinking more like a week.

 

Mike, look.
I can sweeten the pot on this.

 

If I'm staying with you,
the feds will be off your back.

 

I'll just tell them
that I'm babysitting you.

 

Five days. You bring a sleeping bag,
and you're out by the weekend?

 

Done.

 

Hello, Michael.

 

Fi, you're... here.

 

[ American Accent ] I came by for a visit.
The door was locked.

 

So I broke in.

 

New accent.
New... style.

 

Well, I'm in Miami now.

 

[ Irish Accent ] I can't very well be talking
like a friggin' leprechaun, now, can I?

 

[ American Accent ]
This is the new me, Michael.

 

- For now.
- So you're staying in town then.

 

That's great.
Listen, Fi.

 

That's great.
Listen, Fi.

 

- Now is not a really good time for you to-
-Jesus, Mike.

 

You didn't tell me
she was gonna be here.

 

You cost me a lot of money,
you son of a bitch!

 

- I've been waiting to talk
to you for a long time!
- I cost you? Okay.

 

For starters, what you're talking about
never officially happened, all right?

 

But unofficially, even if it had,you deserved
a hell of a lot worse.. .

 

- than what you got, lady.
- Sam.

 

[ Michael Narrating ] There's a reason
spies don't have a lot of parties.

 

Everybody's got a history
with everyone else.

 

That was a legitimate purchase!
The U.S. government had no business-

 

Yeah? Legitimate? A Libyan arms dealer?
How do you figure that?

 

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

 

Fi, I'm thrilled
that you've come by.

 

- But Sam and I need to talk about a job. So you-
-Job?

 

Hmm.

 

Sounds like fun.

 

I'm in.

 

Yeah.
[ Laughs ]

 

I do work like that,yeah. I don't remember
this piece, but we do a lot of volume.

 

You need more like this,
with the foil embossing?

 

Yeah. I mean, I don't know
a lot about printing...

 

Yeah. I mean, I don't know
a lot about printing...

 

but something like that.

 

You got some big machines.

 

Oh,just upgraded.
State of the art.

 

- Want me to show you around?
- Mm-hmm.

 

[ Michael Narrating ]
Often, the best way to get intel.. .

 

is to provoke action,
set people in motion.

 

Pros know better, but they usually have
to work with a few amateurs.

 

And they panic.

 

So you beat the bushes a little
and see what flies out.

 

Once your frightened amateur
leads you to the pros.. .

 

the work begins.

 

Con artists and spies
are both professional liars.

 

Cons do it for the money, and spies do it
for the flag, but it's mostly the same gig.

 

- They run operations.
They follow security procedures.
- [ Camera Shutter Clicking ]

 

They recruit support staff
and issue orders.

 

[ No Audible Dialogue ]

 

- [ Camera Shutter Clicking ]
- [ Sam ] Hey, so this guy
Quentin-your con artist?

 

Hangs out at a club
down in South Beach called Onyx.

 

Nice. Want me to go down there
and do some surveillance?

 

- No, I think we're fine.
- I got a cover I.D. for you, Mikey.

 

- How do you like the name PeterJordan?
- Would you put some pants on?

 

What? I work better
when I can breathe down there.

 

- Do you want to hear about this guy or no?
- Yeah.

 

- Tell me about PeterJordan.
- He was cell mates...

 

with an ex-partner of Quentin's.

 

He, uh,jumped parole about a month ago.
They caught him.

 

He's in a Phoenix holding cell, but they haven't
put him back through the system yet.

 

Kinda looks like you too-
you know, more or less.

 

Not bad for a man in his underwear.

 

Hey, you think that's good?
You should see me without 'em. [ Chuckles ]

 

##[ Woman Singing In Spanish ]

 

[ Michael Narrating ] When you
go after a spy,you send another spy.

 

The same goes for con artists. To catch one,
you've got to beat him at his own game-

 

be a better liar than he is.

 

- ##[ Continues ]
- [ No Audible Dialogue ]

 

Excuse me.
Can I help you?

 

- Quentin King, right?
- Yeah.

 

We have a mutual friend
up in New York. Paco?

 

Few weeks ago, I'm at a dog track in Newark
freezin'my nuts off...

 

and I remember that Paco said if I ever got
down to Miami, I should look you up.

 

So I'm thinkin', hell, anywhere's nicer
than Newark. You know what I'm sayin'?

 

So I got my ass down to Miami.
PeteJordan. Hey.

 

Pete, you got the wrong guy.

 

No, no.
I don't think so.

 

See, I was roommates
with your buddy Paco for a year.

 

He told me about that job
you pulled off up in Tampa.

 

Real nice. I have a business opportunity
I want to discuss with you.

 

- [ Whispers, Indistinct ]
- [ Michael Narrating ]
No matter how good your cover identity is.. .

 

you've got to sell it,
and that's not always easy.

 

Like I said, you got the wrong guy.
I don't know you.

 

I don't know this Paco.
I don't have business.

 

I went through a lot of trouble to find you.
I got a warrant on my ass.

 

Will you hear me out?

 

I'm in water filter sales, man.

 

You want a water filter,
I can help you out.

 

You want a water filter,
I can help you out.

 

I don't want to argue with you,
but what's a water filter salesman doing...

 

with a .45
inside a shoulder holster?

 

That's my business.
But you know what is your business?

 

There's a couple of cops that are sitting over
there by the bar talking to the manager.

 

They've been there for a while.
Probably liquor license.
How about I bring them.. .

 

over here, and we talk
about the terms of your parole?

 

[ Michael Narrating ] Sometimes you have to
decide just how committed you are.. .

 

- to pretending you are who you say you are.
- [ Chuckles ]

 

Anyone ever tell you
you're bad at making friends?

 

Paco said you had some issues, but I like
to give people a chance. That's just how I am.

 

This is what happens.
You're gonna get us outta here...

 

because I like Miami
and I'm not going back to jail.

 

So if those cops even look at me...

 

we'll see how many slugs I can put
through your liver before they take me down.

 

I got 20 bucks on four.
You want to take the over or the under?

 

All right, let's go out back.

 

Smile. Stand up.

 

Put your arm around me and act
like the friends I wanted us to be.

 

[ Laughs ]

 

Here we are. You wanna take that thing
out of my ribs now?

 

Oh, and then you send the cops
right after me? Uh-huh.

 

[ Michael Narrating ] I don't like running
from cops, but it has its advantages.

 

It builds your credibility with a criminal
when you flee a crime scene.

 

- [ Gunshot ]
- I'll be in touch.

 

[ Michael Narrating ] Eavesdropping
and fieldwork go hand in hand.

 

You want to know
what your target is saying.. .

 

what he's typing into his computer.

 

But technology can't work miracles.
Bugs don't plant themselves.

 

Fact is, even the fanciest
equipment.. .

 

usually needs help from
a good old-fashioned crowbar.

 

- [ Zipper Zips ]
- Get onto the boat, plant the bugs...

 

- get out quick.
- Yep. Gotcha. Okay, what's that for?

 

- I could think of something.
- It's for the lock if you have trouble, Sam.

 

Mike, give me some credit.
I mean, I can handle a lock.

 

Quentin had a Colt .45 with extended controls
and a beveled mag well.

 

- He's serious. Be careful, Sam.
- Gotcha.

 

Fi, I want you to fix Quentin's car
so we can disable it if anything happens.

 

- Think you can handle that?
- I'm not gonna answer that.

 

I'm off to make friends.

 

It's me again.

 

Do me a favor, babe.
Take a swim. Water's great.

 

Okay.

 

- Want a drink?
- It depends.

 

- Am I talking to Quentin King
or some water filter salesman?
- Hey, you know how it is.

 

- You could be a cop. You could be a fed.
You could be anyone.
- I'm not just anyone.

 

Well, you can handle yourself.
I'll give you that.

 

So you have something.

 

- You burn me-
- Let's hear your proposal.

 

We'll meet my team.
We'll see.

 

There's your gun back.

 

[ Michael Narrating ] It's always useful
to be able to disable a car remotely.

 

A cell phone, some wire-

 

You can ground the circuit
on the electrical system with a phone call.

 

Are you just about done down there?

 

In a second.

 

This... is an art.

 

No. Wiring crap into a car
is not an art.

 

It's about as subtle
as hitting someone with a brick.

 

Hitting someone with a brick
takes a lot of skill.

 

You should try it sometime.
It's all in the wrist.

 

Sorry. Not my style.

 

I know.
That's right, I forgot.

 

You only do what the suits tell you.

 

You know, that was a cheap shot.

 

[ Michael Narrating ] A good cover identity
keeps the target feeling in control.

 

You talk too much, drink too much
just to let him know he's got the edge.

 

I respect what you're doin'- going after
checking accounts, consumer credit.

 

I mean, it's easy. It's like picking up
coconuts on the beach.

 

I like coconuts as much
as the next guy.

 

But I'm talking about
something bigger than coconuts.

 

Enough with the coconuts.
What's the scam?

 

Annuities.

 

You sell someone an annuity...

 

and they dig deep-

 

home equity, major assets...

 

the money they're saving up
for their grandkids.

 

You give them a piece of paper...

 

and you walk away
with everything they own.

 

- Why do you need us?
- You've got leads.

 

What was your hit rate
on your last scam, one in 50?

 

You go back to everyone you missed.
You nail one in five.

 

Fifty, hundred grand.

 

I got tax documents,
marketing stuff-

 

and a bottle ofJohnnie Walker Blue
when we're done.

 

Ah, well, you know,
we're making money.

 

And this forged crap-
Feds are all over that.

 

But a hundred grand per mark.
Dude, that's millions.

 

Greg, take a walk.

 

Okay?

 

Listen. You don't want this,
I don't want this.

 

In fact, I don't need this.
I'll walk away.

 

- I can walk away from this.
- I want to talk about this.

 

- Come on. Let's talk.
- Let's talk about it.

 

[ Fiona ]
You boys and your computers.

 

If you've got a better way
to find encrypted passwords...

 

and account information,
I'm all ears, baby.

 

I already know that one.
That's a good one. Boo-hoo. [ Chuckles ]

 

[ Continues, Indistinct ]

 

[ Beeping ]

 

- [ Buzzing ]
- Here you go.

 

Stick that up there.
Hurry up about it.

 

We'd have been out of here1 0 minutes ago
if you didn't argue about every little thing.

 

[ Mouthing Words ]

 

[ Beeping ]

 

- [ Buzzing ]
- I've heard surveillance through these things.

 

It sounds like
everyone's underwater.

 

Hey, if you have a way to put a recording
studio in a light fixture, love to hear it.

 

It's millions of dollars. Quentin acts like
I'm a goddamn kid and tells me to go home.

 

Uh-oh.

 

[ Chattering ]

 

- What the hell are you doing here?
- What are you doing here?

 

[ Scoffs ]
We live here.

 

- What? You-
- You live here?

 

- Oh, God.
- You liar.

 

You liar.
You son of a bitch.

 

- I can explain, baby.
- Explain what?

 

That you told me you had a yacht so you can
get in my pants? Is that about right?

 

Oh, I'm sorry, baby.
Oh!

 

I can't believe this.

 

This is our third date.

 

He said this was his boat.

 

- Get out.
- Where's my shoe?

 

- Here.
- Oh.

 

[ Exclaims ]

 

- You are taking me home right now.
- Okay. Okay.

 

- We are leaving. We are leaving!
- Fine. Okay! Geez! Ow!

 

We're so sorry about this.

 

- [ Gasping ]
- Let's go.

 

And eventually we get outta there.

 

I mean, anyway, it's all good.
It was just a little painful in the end.

 

Of course, it wouldn't have been a problem
if I didn't have someone...

 

second-guessing me
and slowing the whole thing down.

 

second-guessing me
and slowing the whole thing down.

 

It was fine, Michael.
Next time I'll check my phone.

 

Hey, how'd it go?
Is Quentin your new best buddy?

 

Hardly. I've cracked ex-K.G.B. officers
easier than this guy.

 

We're gonna have to push these guys,
drive his little team apart.

 

Old school.
You know I like that.

 

You want the full-on
disinformation campaign?

 

No. Keep it small-just enough
to nudge him in my direction.

 

- Can do. Who wants another beer?
- Me.

 

- Fi?
- Yes?

 

I need a favor.

 

I need some information from my mom.

 

- She's not gonna talk about it unless we go-
- We go to dinner.

 

I talked to her yesterday.

 

You talked to her.
Of course you did.

 

And I accepted.
Bringing a vegetable.

 

- I can't wait.
- [ Chuckles ]

 

##[ Woman Singing In Spanish ]

 

[ Michael Narrating ] Go after a group
of people directly, and they pull together.

 

They get stronger.

 

Taking on a tight-knit group
is about making them turn on each other.

 

You plant the seeds of distrust
and watch them grow.

 

I'm still thinking about it.

 

- Well, I talked to Greg and Bonnie-
- Enough about Greg and Bonnie.

 

- They're not in charge here.
- Fine.

 

I'm just sayin'.
We can't delay this much longer.

 

Tax season is coming up.
If people buy in, they do it just before April.

 

So you and Paco...

 

you were cell mates, what, a year?

 

I could think of
worse ways to do time.

 

Paco, man.

 

He still make that pruno?

 

I did a couple months with him in County,
and, man, he made the best prison wine.

 

[ Michael Narrating ]
Of course, sowing seeds of distrust is harder.. .

 

- when nobody trusts you.
- Paco doesn't drink.

 

What are you trying to pull?

 

Yeah. Of course. I forgot.

 

[ Both Laugh ]

 

- What, so you just guessed?
- [ Michael ] Either he drank or he didn't.

 

Fifty-fifty shot,
and I guessed right.

 

Good thing. I think he was planning
on shooting me if I got it wrong.

 

Ah. Nice work, Mike.

 

- How's the betrayal paper trail coming?
- Oh, great.

 

It's, uh, actually
some of my best work.

 

I've got plane tickets for Greg and Bonnie
and a couple of offshore bank accounts.

 

- I'll get it over there tonight and plant it.
- All right.

 

Now, are you seriously taking
Fiona to your mom's?

 

Not like I have a choice.

 

- Good luck with that, brother.
- [ Beeps ]

 

[ Sighs ]
Fi,just do me a favor.

 

Just go...

 

Just go...

 

easy tonight.

 

- [ Laughs ]
- Oh, it is such a pleasure to finally meet you.

 

Oh-Welcome.
Please come in.

 

Uh, this is my friend Laura.

 

She just came by to say hi,
see how things were going.

 

Madeline said she was sure you could
take care of it.

 

Why don't you let me take that.

 

Everything's going to be fine.

 

He used to be a secret agent.

 

[ Laura ]
Well.

 

I-I don't want
to intrude on your supper.

 

- I brought a peach cobbler for dessert.
- Yum.

 

So, are you two getting married?

 

We're thinking about it.
I'd like to be a June bride.

 

Mmm.

 

- That was delicious.
- Thank you.

 

So, um, Fiona, do you-
do you live in Miami now?

 

Well, we'll see.
I like it here.

 

Do you have a job?

 

I'm in between jobs-
a bit like Michael.

 

- I'll- I'll get the dishes.
- Thank you.

 

Michael.

 

Thank you, Fiona.

 

Mom, we had an agreement.
Tell me about the men who came to the house.

 

Um, they asked about you.

 

How often you come to Miami,
whether you have any friends here.

 

And they asked if we were close.

 

You and me?
What did you tell them?

 

I told them that you were
the perfect son.

 

That you always wrote me,
you called me all the time.. .

 

and that the most important
thing to you was family.

 

I told them that,
and they wrote it down.

 

- Why did you tell them that?
- I don't know, Michael.

 

Just seemed nicer than the truth.

 

- [ Cell Phone Ringing ]
- Uh, excuse me.

 

I got a phone call.

 

[ Ringing Continues ]

 

- Hello?
- Were you in on this? Answer me!

 

- Quentin, calm down. What are you talking about?
- Answer me!

 

- I don't know what you're talking-
- I got bank statements.

 

I got plane tickets. Huh?
Greg and Bonnie had some plans.

 

[ Michael Narrating ]
Sometimes a great plan.. .

 

comes together just
a little bit too early.

 

What, you thought you could go around me?
Is that what you thought?

 

Why would I do that?
Yeah, you think about it.

 

I need your leads.
Without that I got nothin'.

 

Greg and Bonnie- two stupid kids
I'd have to share my score with?

 

- You know what I'm sayin'?
- I swear to God,
if I find out you're lying to me-

 

I'm telling the truth.
This might not be what it looks like.

 

They got a goddamn
bottle of champagne!

 

They were gonna rip me off
and go to the Caymans or the Seychelles...

 

- for crying out loud!
-Just don't do anything without me, okay?

 

This will be over tonight.

 

[ Michael Narrating ]
You've been in the business way too long.. .

 

when you recognize
the sound of a.45 caliber over a phone.

 

Don't do anything stupid.

 

- [ Beeping ]
- [ Line Ringing ]

 

Okay, Mike, I'm here.
I'm at the marina.

 

If Quentin leaves the boat, Sam,
our plan is in serious trouble.

 

Yep.Just calm down. He's here.
I can see him walking around on the boat.

 

You gotta make sure
he doesn't go anywhere.

 

Don't worry about it.
I'll keep an eye on him.

 

He's planning on killing Greg and Bonnie,
then blowing out of town with the money.

 

- Hang on.
- What do you see?

 

He's coming out right now.
Tell you what.

 

I'll use Fiona's gizmo.
I'll just zap the car.

 

- Call me when it's done.
- All right.

 

[ Michael Narrating ] That's what happens
when you wire a cell phone to a blasting cap.. .

 

in the gas tank instead of
the electrical system.

 

Son of a bitch!

 

Fiona, you were supposed to stop the car,
not blow it into the Everglades.

 

What happened to
shorting the ignition?

 

Well, you said disable.
It's not going anywhere.

 

You know what I meant.
I almost had him. I was this close.

 

The F.B.I. is back, I see.
I'm under surveillance again.

 

Sam, I thought you were
supposed to handle that.

 

Mike, there's only so much I can do.
I gotta tell the suits...

 

why we're down at the marina
to keep them off our back.. .

 

but if somebody starts blowing up cars
down at the marina-

 

Remind me why you're friends with someone
who put the F.B.I. back onto you.

 

- That is so unfair.
- Sam, what about Quentin?

 

You were supposed to nudge him,
not send him into a homicidal frenzy.

 

Look,you guys were off doing your thing,
so I signed up Greg and Bonnie.. .

 

to this Medallion Airways executive service
to the Cayman Islands...

 

- you know, as part of the setup.
- Yeah?

 

Well, they got this new thing
where they overnight a bottle of champagne
to the new members.

 

Quentin started sniffing around, and in less
than an hour, he found everything that I did.

 

It was a bunch of little stuff,
but he put it all together.

 

Turn him around.
Make him trust you.

 

He's not in a trusting mood, Fi.

 

[ Sighs ]
I know you're angry, Michael.

 

But I know that an exploding car...

 

can throw a man off balance.

 

- You'll thank me.
- He won't even talk to me.

 

He won't even answer my calls.

 

Well, you'll have to be
extra charming.

 

##[ Dance]

 

[ Michael Narrating ]
Whether you're in Moscow, Tehran or Miami.. .

 

club girls are a good
source of information.

 

Men say things to a beautiful woman.

 

They give out phone numbers, hotel keys.
They let down their guard.

 

- [ No Audible Dialogue ]
- Getting information from
a club girl means buying drinks.

 

It's no problem
with an operational slush fund.

 

It's a big problem if you're spending cash
scrounged from your mom's purse.

 

You have to help me out.
Please. Please.

 

We're doing this night at a club
in Hollywood Beach. Amazing.

 

I mean, I'm flying in a deejay from Berlin.
It's gonna be crazy.

 

Quentin reserves a V.I.P. table
for 4,000 bucks...

 

and I can't get in touch with him
to tell him the date changed.

 

Can you help me? He's gonna be pissed.
You know how angry he gets.

 

So how about us?
Are we on the list?

 

Oh, 1 00 percent.
You're all in.

 

Just please, please help me out.
Please.

 

Well, I think he only uses this
number for girls, but here.

 

[ Beeping ]

 

You're a hard man to reach.

 

[ Quentin ] Yeah, well, things have been
a little bit busy. What do you want?

 

Same thing as before-
Make some money.

 

- Where are you?
- I'm laying low.

 

When can we get together?

 

I don't think that's
a very good idea right now.

 

Quentin, buddy, I'm the only guy
you can trust right now.

 

- Your partners just tried to kill you.
You need a friend.
- [ Breathing Heavily ]

 

Quentin, you need to learn
to reach out.

 

We can help each other.

 

- Quentin?
- Fine. Where?

 

[ Ship Horn Blowing ]

 

Whoa, whoa, buddy.
It's me.

 

- I've been waitin' here, man.
- You said 2:00.

 

It's 2:00.

 

You know they're back on my yacht?

 

- I'm gonna go down there. I swear to God.
- Listen. Buddy-

 

Two bodies, a murder weapon, and you're
suspect number one. I mean, you know my style.

 

I'm not afraid to pull a trigger if that's what
has to happen, but let's be smart about this.

 

- Got a better idea?
- Yeah.

 

I know a guy.
Know what I'm sayin'?

 

Someone who can deal with this.

 

It'll cost some money,
but he'll make this go away.

 

Quiet, no connection to you.

 

One wire transfer, it's done.
And then we can go on with our business.

 

[ Michael Narrating ] A hit man
is like a plumber, a dentist or a mechanic.

 

Everybody's always
looking for a good one.

 

All right. Let's set that up.
You do both of them?

 

- How much?
- Fifty thousand.

 

And they'll both be dead?
No connection to me?

 

- All right.
- I'll be in touch.

 

Okay.

 

- [ Phone Beeps ]
- Okay.

 

Sam, Quentin bit. I need you and Fiona
to deal with Bonnie and Greg.

 

- It's time they got out of town.
- Can do, Mike.

 

- You know you're out of orange juice?
- Sam.

 

[ Greg ] What am I supposed to do?
His car blew up. He's gone.

 

Maybe he's got enemies
he didn't tell us about.

 

Maybe he's got enemies
he didn't tell us about.

 

It's that couple
that broke into the boat.

 

Good afternoon. Miami P.D.
I'm Detective Cagney. This is Detective Lacey.

 

We'd like to talk to you.

 

I'm not gonna lie to you.
You two are in a lot of trouble.

 

We'd like to know
where your partner is.

 

- You tell me.
- [ Chuckles ]

 

You know, you might want
to be more cooperative.

 

We've been monitoring you two
for quite a while.

 

You might recall walking in on us
as we were planting this.

 

We have all the financial
transactions off your computer.

 

- So, your partner?
- We don't know, okay?

 

- He's just gone.
- [ Fiona ] Too bad.

 

There's no deal for you if he doesn't show up.
You go down for the whole show.

 

Miami juries, they don't like people
who rob retirees and beat up grandmas.

 

That wasn't us. That was Quentin.
We never touched them.

 

- Quentin was the one smacking them around.
- Shut up, Bonnie.

 

We don't even have the money.
Quentin transferred it all to his own account-

 

Shut up!

 

Of course, you could help us find him,
testify for a reduced sentence...

 

and only get-
I don't know-five to 1 0.

 

- I want to talk to a lawyer.
- [ Fiona ] Go ahead.

 

Don't take too long.
And don't go anywhere.

 

You know, for all your anti-government
speechifying, you do lady cop pretty well.

 

Thanks.

 

[ Sam ] Okay, so you bet
they'd be gone by 4:00.

 

About another couple minutes.
After that, I'm 20 bucks richer.

 

I'll win. Greg comes on strong,
but you can tell he's scared of prison.

 

He's selling her on the sandy beaches
of Canc? right now.

 

- Mexico? You think?
- Mmm. Or the Caribbean.

 

Hmm.

 

Uh-oh.

 

[ Laughs ]
Okay. There they go.

 

Don't look so smug.

 

[ Michael Narrating ]
I don't much like dealing with paranoids.

 

They get erratic,
make bad decisions.

 

Of course, that can be a help when you need
them to make a bad decision.

 

- [ Gasps ] Jesus Christ,
you scared the crap out of me.
- What the hell...

 

- [ Gasps ] Jesus Christ,
you scared the crap out of me.
- What the hell...

 

- do you think you're doing?
- I'm going to the bank like we said.

 

- With the F.B.I. watching you?
- F.B.I.? What are you talking about?

 

Right there! Look!

 

F.B.I.? How?

 

- I don't know. You tell me, Quentin.
- Greg and Bonnie.

 

I took the cash.
They must have gone to the feds.

 

You're careless. You're careless and you're
gonna get us caught.

 

- I am not going back to prison.
- All right.

 

- Shut up for a second and let me think.
- There is no time for that.

 

You need Greg and Bonnie dead
more than ever. They're your only witnesses.

 

- They know me. This is a disaster, Quentin.
- Okay, okay. Fine.

 

We'll go to the bank. I'll wire the money
to your guy like we talked about.

 

Wire the money?
With an F.B.I. tail?

 

Are you stupid? Or are you just
trying to get us caught?

 

You know what?
Have a nice life.

 

Wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait.

 

We could get somebody else
to make the transfer.

 

It has to happen right now! What are you gonna
do, find some guy on the street and say...

 

- ''Can you wire money to Aruba?'' Nice try.
- You do it.

 

No. I'm not cleaning up your mess.

 

They don't know you.
I'll give you my account numbers.

 

You send the money.
We'll meet up later.

 

No. I take all the risk and I save your ass.
No, thank you.

 

It's gonna work.
I'm telling you.

 

And then we make some money?

 

Then we make some money.

 

Fine. But you make sure
the feds follow you...

 

because if they follow me, you'll wish
I put a bullet in your head right here.

 

[ Clears Throat ]

 

[ Chattering ]

 

[ Michael Narrating ]
Truth is, identity theft isn't hard.

 

A number and an I.D . is all you need
to drain a bank account.. .

 

and return a lot of money
to some very surprised retirees.

 

But why stop there?

 

As long as you're stealing
someone's identity.. .

 

why not use it to contact some known terrorist
organizations on un-secure phone lines?

 

Why not use it to threaten some federal
judges and insult the local drug cartel?

 

- [ Police Radio Chatter]
- Most fun I've had in Miami.

 

It was all there.

 

I looked at my bank statement,
and there it was- all the money.

 

- I'm glad it could work out.
- I told ya. Didn't I tell you?

 

How did you do it?
How did you get it all back?

 

You don't want to know.

 

- No, really, you don't want to know.
- Oh.

 

Well, how much do I owe you?

 

Well, I didn't do it for the money.
Let's call it...

 

500 for expenses.

 

Call it 300, and you promise
not to enter any more contests.

 

[ Chuckling ]
I promise.

 

Michael!

 

Yeah, Ma?

 

Thank you.

 

Wait.

 

There's one more thing.

 

Those men who came to the house
asking the questions-

 

They gave me this.

 

They asked me to call them if you should ever
come to Miami or try to contact me.

 

Did you contact them?

 

No, Michael, I did not.

 

Family comes first.

 

[ Phone Beeping ]

 

[ Line Ringing ]

 

[ Man ]
You've been a busy boy, Michael.

 

Very impressive.

 

Glad to be appreciated.
Who is this?

 

Oh,just a friend.

 

Who is this?

 

Stay out of trouble, Michael.
We'll be in touch.

 

[ Beeps ]